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Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Why Nurses Make the Best Lovers (Author: "Dageaux")

Boring backstory: my boss and I were talking about how common it was to see IT gurus and nurses pairing up. Immediately afterward I see an article on the net saying that women prefer IT geeks to date for various reasons. So I put these thoughts together and realized that truly nurses are the finest women to take to your bed. Being a IT geek and apparently in high demand in todays sausage market and married to nurse myself I can say that nurses do indeed make the best lovers/girlfriends/wives. I decided to come up with a list of reasons why it is good to date, marry, or at least sleep with a nurse:

1.) They have almost no inhibitions. They have seen it all, legs ripped off, no problem. Is your penis shaped oddly? not only will they not be freaked out but can tell you the medical condition that causes that. You piddly ideas of kinky sex are nothing to these women. She probably inspected four penises before lunch today, she has no problems with "touching it"

2.) Nurses have good skills at using profanities. Don't get me wrong they can be ladies in the appropriate setting and are often the best hostesses at parties and social events, but as a general rule your average nurse can curse up a blue streak. This comes from situation in the operating room that most folks don't want to know about "Holy Shit did you see that fucking arterial blood spray out of that gunshot wound?" "For fuck's sake this is his fourth goddamned attempt at suicide? Can't this sorry piece of shit get ANYTHING right?". This can come in handy when you are shooting pool at the local biker bar or for that special talk you only hear in the bedroom.

3.) Any woman that can look good in scrubs = HAWT!!! they don't make that shit for fashion and yet so many of them looks so cute in that obnoxious green.

4.) They are truly caregivers. They can fix you after you stick a screwdriver into that power-supply....immediately after they stop laughing.

5.) By definition they are fairly well educated, and most are definitely above average intelligence.

6.) They have a great sense of humor. You don't work all day in the OB/GYN room and not develop a great (albeit slightly skewed) sense of humor, trust me on this.

7.) They have neat toys. As an IT geek I am fascinated by the stuff my wife brings home from work, free samples, disposables, and shit the equipment manufacturers give them. Want a device the size of an ink pen that you can use to burn off body parts? They make those. Need some stats, yea she has a whole set of the damned things. Knives? shieet they make knives so sharp they are dangerous to handle at all, even the blunt end. Needles, stitches, syringes, lubrication jelly, little machines that can take your scrotal temperature from across the room, I tell ya these girls got it all.

8.) While being wonderful caring women, they have no compunctions about yanking a knot in your ass should you act foolishly. Nurses are hard women and usually have an extremely sensitive bullshit-o-meter and almost no patience for any bullshit whatsoever. Most will put a knife in your ass if you fuck up then sew you up when you repent.

9.) They make more money than you. Unless you are a doctor, lawyer, or bank president, chances are your average nurse makes more money than you do. These women are in high demand and are paid very handsomely. She will always have a job, no matter where she goes her profession is in "Help Wanted" section of the paper. They also generally have good work ethics, they know that nothing of value comes without cost and they aren't afraid to get their hands dirty to accomplish a goal.

10.) Go get 'em attitude. there are so many stumbling blocks in Nursing school, so many chances to do something else, anything else. So many times where it is easier to quit than go on. Yet RN's have made it past all that. They have reached the pinnacle of their career. A nurse won't ever give up, she won't ever quit as long as there is even a remote possibility you may be worth saving. This too is a good thing in a relationship.

Thank God for our nurses.

Author: "Dageaux"

1 comment:

  1. hahaha ok ok maxado taas tingin nya sa na nurse astig yun..^_^